Wednesday, September 29, 2010
stuck on stupid
I had planned on a long post today, I even journaled about what I was going to write. There are quite a few topics bouncing around in my head. I sat here and edited pictures to add and started typing a few different times. The words just wouldn't flow. I just don't have the energy to write about the things I want to. I just hate that. I hate that I have ideas I want to share and things I want to say but I just can't. It's like I get stuck, I feel stupid and confused. I guess it's the " widow brain ". I have the thoughts, but I can't express them in a way that would make sense. There is nothing that makes sense to me anymore. I want to write but all I can do is Stare at the wall.
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I know this may sound stupid and simplistic Lace, but it's just your brain trying to protect you from feeling too much at once. A defense mechanism to prevent your heart from imploding. I have felt this way often-numb and out of touch-or simply just too full of raw emotion to express myself sufficiently. I love you and I'll always be here for you whether you're pouring your heart out, talking a mile a minute, or just sitting silently unable to speak. My thoughts are constantly with you.
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