Monday, February 7, 2011

I don't want it anymore

I don't want it anymore.
It's broken.
It belonged to him and he's gone.
What am I supposed to do with it now?


  1. you can hang onto it. broken does not necessarily mean destroyed. keep it close. nurture it. talk to it. tell it you understand and that you won't leave it.

    Bunny has started her world tour. she will get to you and then you can hold her and tell her everything. show her your broken heart. she will talk to it with her ineffable silence that speaks volumes. she will nurture you and comfort you with her steadfastness. write in her journal. take one of her gifts for you out of her bag. she only wants to be there with you to let you know you are not alone.

    i wish you peace.

  2. oh sweetie.

    Sitting here beside you, holding your hand, and crying with you.

    Boo x

  3. Nick had been dead 3 years before I could throw out the bicycle that was broken that he'd intended to fix ... the bicycle that was broken when I met him, 13 years before he died.

    Eventually, letting go of those things gets easier. I still have his laptop though ... nearly 7 years later.

  4. A broken heart can always be mended. It will never be the same; however, there will always be a very special spot for Elliot in it. Right now, you can't see that spot, because your heart is in so many pieces. Slowly, over time it will start to come back together and you will see him in there again and it won't be so painful. (((HUGS)))

  5. Maybe my "totally didn't get it" response can give you hope. When I was newly widowed, or just a year or two out, of COURSE, I would have known you were talking about your shattered heart.

    Maybe the fact that after 6.5 years, my your heartbreak didn't resonate with mine can offer you some hope: You won't always feel the way you do right now. I promise you that.

    Take a cue from the title of my blog: "Forever changed, but not forever broken."

    -- Wishing you a measure of peace today